Feel Like You Should Be Further Ahead? Do These 3 Things
Do you sometimes feel a sense of pressure that you should be “further ahead” by now?
This is something basically everyone I know battles with and it really dominated my early twenties.
I was in constant angst that other people were further ahead than I was and it was painful.
You have to get a handle on this now or it will continue to poison your experiences in life. You’ll continue to feel empty, hopeless and frustrated no matter what you do or what you achieve.
The good news is there are only 3 things you need to do to turn this around!
BUT remember: these are not a one time thing. These are conscious choices you need to make every single day, otherwise you will slip back into old, unhelpful thought patterns that leave you stuck in a funk.
Ok, so here they are:
1. Adore Your Detour
Detours aren’t always bad and getting there sooner isn’t always better either. There are lessons and learnings we get along the detour that are often key in setting us up for our arrival at the next destination.
Think about something you really wanted to achieve and no matter what you did it, it just didn’t show up. It wasn’t until some experience or challenge that you went through, that the thing you wanted so badly, suddenly appeared.
You’ve got to trust the timing of your life. Every experience has taught you what you needed to know to get to this point.
2. End The Comparison Game
When you compare your journey with someone else’s, this is where all the all the “I should be further ahead” BS stuff comes up.
It’s been said that “Comparison is the thief of joy”.
So how do you stop comparing? You put your blinders on.
When you’re looking to the left and to the right, it’s actually slowing your momentum (or stopping you all together). You’ve got to be really focussed on your own game.
3. Don’t go and actively search for things that will make you feel “not enough”.
I used to be the biggest E News junkie, loved all the MTV shows and read the Daily Mail Celebrity Column about 5 or 6 x a day. I was obsessed.
Now I don’t watch or look at any of these and I can’t even tell you what a difference it has made.
> Who reads about the latest celebrity marriage to collapse and feels filled with inspiration about how they can find lasting love in a stable relationship?
> Hearing about who is looking SO good in a bikini since she lost all her baby weight, doesn’t inspire me to go the gym or eat a salad. Frankly it makes me feel not that good about myself.
What we read and watch has a massive impact on our internal dialogue and in turn the kind of choices we make in how we treat our bodies & the lifestyle we lead.
Here’s a bonus tip: do a social media cleanse.
Stop looking at people’s pictures or posts who you tend to compare yourself to.
Don’t pick up magazines or watch TV shows that portray really unrealistic views of perfectionism.
It takes vigilance and conscious effort to commit to this, but I promise when you do, you will feel better than you’ve ever felt before. You will have more time and energy to make your life the best it can be.
REMEMBER: you’re exactly where you need to be.
I love affirmations, I find they are a great way to reinforce a new way of thinking, so if you’re like me and love them too use this:
“I am exactly where I need to be and I trust the process of my life”
Now I’d love to hear from you – have you ever struggled with the “I should be further ahead by now” – what did you do that helped?